What is Divorce
The legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body.
Some marriages fail and the causes of divorce can be diverse. Cheating, mismatch of characters, beliefs, dissatisfaction, lack of love, jealousy, and many others form a long range of reasons why people fall apart.
Causes of Divorce in Nigeria
1: Lack of preparation; This reason for a divorce is not indigenous for Nigeria: it happens everywhere all around the globe. Young people think that they are prepared for everything when their bodies reach physical maturity but their minds are still infantile. This is why they often tend to get married by impulse, being totally unprepared. The lack of emotional, psychological, and even intellectual preparation before getting married is one of the most common reasons why marriages fail. No understanding of the obligations, responsibility, care, and communication causes a complete mismatch.
2: Lack of courtship; Quite often, young people don’t give themselves enough time to get to know each other better before getting married. They simply meet, feel the attraction, and decide that they are in love. Without the period of dating and courting, they have no chance of getting to know the characters, habits, and life views of each other. The courting time allows young sweethearts to find out whether they are truly in love, whether their tempers match each other, and also what the HIV status of the partner is, whether he or she is fertile or sterile, and so on. All these things can be vital for a marriage.
3: Lack of compatibility; The physical draw is often treated as love, and it’s one of the biggest mistakes young spouses tend to make. They discover that their natures, intellects, emotions, and habits are incompatible only when they are already married, the time of the first passion is over, and the reality dawns on them. Incompatibility is one of the reasons couples divorce after decades of marriage.
4: Lack of openness; We all want to look better than we are in the eyes of our sweethearts. Quite often, people delude their partners to force them into marriage or something like that. Men tell girls tales about their wealth, girls conceal the truth about their previous relationships, and so on. All this leads to the collapse of trust and the collapse of a marriage.
5: Infertility; Nigerians have a very special attitude towards children. A marriage that stays childless for more than two years is often treated with anxiety. Women who have no children in marriage are often blamed for being infertile even if the problem is in their men. It can be a very big problem. It happens often that a partner hides the fact of their infertility from the other side, knowing about it before their marriage. Of course, when the truth comes up, the marriage collapses because of the trust issues.
6: Broken expectations; People rarely realize that their expectations are their own problem and nobody is obliged to fulfill them. However, some people even get married expecting something particular from their partners. Of course, when nothing like this happens, the marriage collapses.
7: Infidelity; Being married to somebody means being tied to this somebody and sharing everything with this person. The spousal infidelity is one of the most common causes of divorce in many countries around the world, not only in Nigeria. It’s very hard if possible to forgive and forget the pains caused by a cheating partner.
8: Lack of communication; Talking to each other is vital in a marriage. Discussing complicated issues, finding mutual points of view on the ways of bringing up children, running the household, spending money, and so on makes a lot of sense for a couple. Small problems that are kept silent tend to grow into bigger and finally huge problems. An additional
9: Domestic violence; It’s sad to admit that there are still abusers in Nigeria who practice domestic violence on their spouses and children. Cruelty and disrespect, violence and total control, restrictions, humiliations, and beating – these are the sad reasons many marriages in Nigeria fail at any stage. This is one of the most serious problems with marriages, which demands special attention and a complex approach to be solved.